Lyrics
Intro stadium announcer, roaring crowd, guitar feedback
Ladies and gentlemen...
Main Street.
Between a bakery and a Prius.
Verse 1
It's nine a.m. on Saturday, I just need a loaf of bread
There's one spot left on Main Street and it's shining up ahead
I pull up next to a Prius, throw my blinker on with pride
I put it in reverse and something wakes up deep inside
Pre-Chorus
Cut it left, now straighten out
A lady with a stroller starts to shout
Cut it right and ease it back
Now I'm somehow on the railroad track
Chorus
Parallel park! (Whoa-oh!)
In and out and in and out
Parallel park! (Whoa-oh!)
Forty tries and I won't back down
Give me one more inch, give me one more try
I will kiss that curb before I die
Parallel park!
Verse 2
By noon the bakery's closing and a crowd has gathered round
There's a man selling hot dogs and a band from out of town
Channel Six is hovering, the helicopter's low
The mayor cut a ribbon on my seventy-second go
Pre-Chorus
Cut it left, now straighten out
That stroller baby's driving now
Cut it right and ease it back
He parked it first try, and he didn't look back
Chorus
Parallel park! (Whoa-oh!)
In and out and in and out
Parallel park! (Whoa-oh!)
Ninety tries and I won't back down
Give me one more inch, give me one more try
I will kiss that curb before I die
Parallel park!
Bridge sudden power ballad, lighters up, spoken
Some men climb mountains.
Some men sail the sea.
I am a man between a Prius and a fire hydrant.
This is Worst Song Ever, number thirty.
And the hydrant is winning.
Guitar solo the backup beeper beeps in rhythm
Final Chorus key change, full stadium choir
Parallel park! (Whoa-oh!)
In and out and in and out
Parallel park! (Whoa-oh!)
Two hundred tries and I won't back down
They chalked my name on Main Street, built a statue of my car
I'm one inch from the curb and I have never been this far
Parallel park!
Outro one tiny curb tap, crowd explodes, fireworks, then silence
Sir.
Street cleaning.
You can't park here.