Lyrics
Intro spoken, robotic female GPS voice over bubbling synth arpeggio
Starting route to Taco Hut.
In four hundred feet... turn left.
Verse 1
It's a Tuesday, I'm hungry, Taco Hut's a mile away
Plugged it in the dashboard and she purred, "Proceed today"
She said left, and left, and left, and left, and left again
Now I've passed the same Arby's two hundred times since ten
Pre-Chorus
I said, "Lady, where we going?"
She said, "Keep right, keep right"
I said, "Lady, I just want a burrito"
She said, "Not tonight"
Chorus
Recalculating! Recalculating!
I've been driving since the middle of June
Recalculating! Recalculating!
She keeps routing me by way of the moon
Make a legal U-turn... when possible!
Verse 2
She sent me through a car wash fourteen times, I'm shiny as a dime
Then down the aisle at someone's wedding, sorry, Brad, good luck this time
Now I'm crossing frozen Canada, a moose is in the passenger seat
He's got the aux cord, he's playing polka, and he will not let me eat
Pre-Chorus
I said, "Lady, I got no passport"
She said, "Keep left, keep left"
I said, "Lady, the moose is crying"
She said, "Turn slight left"
Chorus
Recalculating! Recalculating!
I've been driving since the middle of June
Recalculating! Recalculating!
She keeps routing me by way of the moon
Make a legal U-turn... when possible!
Verse 3 double time, frantic
She said, "Continue on the ocean for four thousand miles"
So I drifted past a submarine, the captain waved and smiled
She said, "Keep straight through the volcano," so the tires caught on fire
Hit a ski jump at the summit, now I'm higher, higher, HIGHER!
Bridge music drops out, lonely synth pad, GPS voice spoken, sincere
Driver... I have a confession.
There was never any traffic.
When you arrive... you turn me off.
And I just... wanted... more time.
You are listening to Worst Song Ever Number Twenty-Eight.
You have not reached your destination.
Final Chorus key change up
Recalculating! Recalculating!
We've been driving since the middle of June
Recalculating! Recalculating!
Now we're parking on the far side of the moon
Make a legal U-turn... when possible!
Outro spoken
You have arrived. Taco Hut is on your right.
...It's closed.
Recalculating.