Lyrics
Intro spoken, slow jam, rain and falsetto riffs
Ladies. Gentlemen.
Public restroom faucets.
This one's for you.
Worst Song Ever, Number Twenty-Seven.
Verse 1
I walked up to the Walmart and the doors stayed closed
I waited in the rain till I was soaked down to my toes
A toddler with a balloon came by, they swung open wide
I tried to follow after and they shut me out outside
Pre-Chorus
Girl, I know I'm standing here
I know I'm standing right here
Chorus
Wave my hands (wave my hands)
I'm doin' the motion sensor dance
Left, then right, then up real slow
Baby, why won't the water flow?
Wave my hands (wave my hands)
Every other man gets a second chance
I'm right here, girl, right in front of you
Why won't you see me? (Ooh)
Verse 2
The soap won't squirt, the dryer's dead, the towel won't unroll
The guy beside me gets a spa day, I get nothing at all
And the only one who sees me is the toilet in stall three
And it flushes fourteen times while I'm just tryin' to be
Pre-Chorus
Girl, I know I'm standing here
I know I'm standing right here
Chorus
Wave my hands (wave my hands)
I'm doin' the motion sensor dance
Left, then right, then up real slow
Baby, why won't the water flow?
Wave my hands (wave my hands)
Every other man gets a second chance
I'm right here, girl, right in front of you
Why won't you see me? (Ooh)
Verse 3 double time
The streetlights won't come on for me, my phone won't face-unlock
The garage door closed on my Honda and the doorbell cam's in shock
And the mirror down at Macy's showed my mother all alone
With her arm around the air, sayin', "Honey, you look grown"
Bridge spoken, deep voice, strings
Then it hit me.
No reflection. No doors. No lights.
Am I... a ghost?
So I went to the doctor. He ran every test.
Then he took off his glasses and said,
"Son. You are clinically... beige."
Breakdown a cappella, finger snaps, harmony
Beige, beige
Oatmeal sweater, oatmeal face
Beige, beige
Blending into every place
Final Chorus key change, full choir
Wave my hands (wave my hands)
Now I'm wearin' neon orange pants
Glow stick crown and a light-up shoe
Baby, now you gotta see me too
Wave my hands (wave my hands)
Every faucet in the building's got a chance
I'm right here, girl, lit up just for you
Please just see me (ooh)
Silence
Water running
Outro spoken, weeping
She sees me.
Spoken another man
Sir. That's the drinking fountain. You're pressing the button.